How long...
How long will she feel this kind of pain? It seems never-ending. It is so painful that she couldn't feel anything at all.
She always fails. She always falls. She always gets fooled. She just thought everything's changed. She thought she already got over this stage. Now, her hope and trust got crushed again. She wants to cry. She wants to cry so much, yet her tears fail her too.
If she would change everything, in her heart, she wants her world to be different. She has tried so hard to be a better version of herself. However, everything is making it hard for her. Well, she might be the problem. Her impulsive self. She might be born to be alone and to go through these hardships. It's really hard. She is almost on her edge. This is what she is in her thirty years of life. She is certain this is not just a midlife crisis because she has been going through this ever since. She even fought so hard to survive the deepest fall way back then. Is now the time to give up? Give up on expecting true love for her from this world. She feels like she can't go any further. She feels so tired. She seems to have exhausted herself too much to no avail.
When will happiness come? When it comes, for sure it would not taste as sweet as it should be since she has been longing for it for so long that she got used to not having it at all.
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